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12月21日 Holiday WishesHappy Holidays!!!
To all my friends:
Here's wishing you a wonderful holiday season filled with
family and friends...
And lots and lots of good cheer!!!
12月18日 Change is GoodI was goofing around between calls and added a random picture to my page. Not one of mine, although I have about 12 rolls of film that need to be developed. Anyway, I hope you like it. 12月15日 No Christmas This YearI work full-time and make $11.00 and hour, but I still can't pay my bills. I still can't afford to buy even one gift for my son this holiday and the more I think about it, the more I want to crawl in a hole and let the world pass me by. Why is that there are so many people in this world who are going through the same thing that I am right now and nobody seems to think there is a problem? Poverty is a disease of pandemic proportions. People have tried to come up with a cure, but usually end up doing nothing more than putting a bandaid over the wound so they can pretend it doesn't exist. Especially, here. People come out of the woodwork to give needy families gifts and food for Christmas, but what about the rest of the year? Eventually, the bandaid will fall off and the wound will fester.
I don't know what to say about Salt Lake. I love it here. There is tons of things to do and I can live in general obscurity if I so choose. But I am tired of struggling to keep my head above water. I'm hoping that when I finish school this coming summer that will change. I keep telling my son that in order to survive these days you have to have, not just a good education, but a great education. I don't want to leave Salt Lake, but if I can't find a good paying job when I get out of school, I won't have any other choice.
People who want to move to Salt Lake are told that the unemployment rate is very low, but what they aren't saying is that it seems that most people who live here have to work two or three jobs to make ends meet. Especially if you are single. There are jobs out there, but look at the wages these jobs are paying and tell me that people are going to survive if they are only working one job.
The one thing that makes it hard for us to survive here is rent prices. Sure coming from places like California or
New York the rent here might seem cheap. That is until you start trying to pay for it on the wages you are paid. I live in a crappy 2 bedroom apartment and pay over $800.00 a month. That right there is almost half my income. That cost includes extra because I have furry children that I have to pay extra for, and yes, I could get rid of them and pay less rent, but getting rid of them would nearly rip my heart out. What aggravates me about this is that when I signed my lease for another year, they increased my total rent by $75.00. Hardly acceptable in any situation, but since I didn't have the extra money to move at the time, I felt sucked in and without options.
I have thought about getting a second job, but between work and school, I hardly have the time. So, I struggle and focus on the light at the end of the tunnel. I am halfway through school and when I am finished I will make anywhere from $15 to $20 an hour. Hopefully, that will be enough to keep us afloat.
My lease isn't up until July, but I am starting to look now for a different place. I have found several that I am interested in and the initial rent on some of them is less than it is where I am living. For the most part, they are spread throughout Taylorsville and Murray. I think there may be a couple in West Valley City.
I count my blessings though. At least my son and I are healthy and we have a roof over our head and for the most part food in the fridge. We have friends and family who care about us. We may not have gifts wrapped in fancy paper, but we have each other. So, while you are all opening presents on Christmas day or whenever, think of all those who have nothing and be grateful for what you do have.
Happy hoolidays!!! 12月12日 Is it worth it?I'm struggling to grasp the concept of balance. It's the beginning of another term for me at school (Did I mention that a term is 10 weeks long and we have a week off in between?). As usual, I will probably throw myself into my classes like I usually do. The end result will be, as usual, that I am exhausted and have no energy for the other things in my life.
I suppose I could give up my pursuit of a 4.0 GPA and not study so much. But the way I see it, a 4.0 will look good to a potential employer and could get me a better job. It's all about the money right now. I know that sounds shallow, but when you are struggling to make ends meet like I am, a better job with more money is worth studying your ass off for.
So, my work suffers, my son suffers, and in the end I suffer. Is it worth it? Well, let me put it to you this way. As we speak, I am looking at one of the only PAYING externship postitions because my grades have been exceptional. Most externship postitions don't pay in anything other than experience. This one pays real money and if I am hired permanently after my externship, I will be making nearly $20.00 an hour. Tell me that isn't worth busting my rear for. 12月10日 What To Do.The lost is found!!! The Boy will live!!!
I volunteered to work extra hours on Saturday. And we were busy. I'm glad we aren't open every Sat. By the time I got home The Boy had found the phone. I can breath a big sigh of relief.
We have a slight dilemma. Sunday we were supposed to build a trebuchet for The Boy's science project, but the people who were supposed to help had to back out at the last minute. I don't what we are going to do now. The project is due on the 14th and between work and school I don't have time to help him and we don't have tools or materials to build the silly thing anyway. I thought I would e-mail his teacher and let him know what the situation is, but I don't know if that will help matters. I'm hoping that he will do something to work with The Boy so he can still get a grade for the project.
So, it was an otherwise quiet weekend. I Love the snow
 !!! It makes driving so fun!!!12月8日 Why do they do that?What do kids, teenagers in particular, gain from behaving irresponsibly?
 Have you ever been so mad at someone that you walked out the door without saying goodbye? I never do that. Or I should say I never did that until this morning. I was so mad at The Boy, I couldn't see straight
. My only phone service is a cell phone which my mom is paying for. The Boy has a habit of sticking the phone in his pocket when I don't have it with me. I have told him over and over again to leave it alone because it doesn't belong to him, but he does it anyway. Well, last night, he lost it. He has no idea what he did with it or where it could be. We have about a foot of heavy, wet snow and I have half a mind to kick his butt out the door and make him go and find it.That phone had all of my important contacts in it, including my mom's new telephone number, so I have no way to call her and let her know he lost it. 12月5日 Heart Breaking StoryI was driving home from work yesterday and as usual was flipping through the radio channels I have preset in my car. I came upon KBARE (not sure if those are the call letters or not) and they were interviewing this guy named Ron for a holiday contest they are having. If he wins, he gets $1000 dollars to help with Christmas. As I came in he was talking about how his wife had cheated on him for years and he had truely wanted to work things out with her, but it just kept getting worse. At this point, I was thinking big deal. Then he started talking about how she cleaned out his bank accounts and (trying to hold back tears. He is a man after all) he couldn't buy gifts for his kids. He has a boy and a girl. The girl is 8 and has a rare disorder that causes her to have seizures everyday. I forget how old the boy was. Anyway, as he goes on talking about his kids, he can't hold back the tears anymore and he is crying and telling the people listening that his only wish for the holiday is to be able to give his kids something for Christmas.
The DJ asked Ron what he would do with the money if he won and Ron said he would buy clothes and coats and hats and boots for his kids and get them a couple of gifts. Very heart breaking. Even now, I have a hard time holding back the tears. While they were talking, another call came in. This one was from Kevin. Kevin owns a restoration business and he and his employees were offering to takes Ron's kids out and get them suited up for winter.
What's interesting about this is that even though I am so far behind on my bills that my car may be repossessed and we may not have heat and electricity soon, I wanted to help this guy give his kids Christmas. Every last penny I make needs to go to get caught up, so I may not even be able to give my own son Christmas, but I wanted to help Ron's kids.
I kept thinking I needed to hear this otherwise why would I have continued to listen to talk when I usually just click on a different station. I needed to listen because it puts my situation into perspective. While I lack funds for certain things and I am struggling and still not making ends meet, I don't have health issues and child care issues to worry about. I only have one child to provide for and he is old enough to fend for himself while I am at work or school and he's healthy as a horse. So, I guess I should count my blessings and quit bitching about what I don't have. |
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